Speaker 1: 0:01

You're listening to the Evolve Men Podcast, episode number one. Are you ready to break free from hesitation, self-doubt and isolation? Do you want to lead with confidence, build powerful connections and live boldly? I'm Cory Baum and I'm here to share the most impactful strategies and mindsets that I've learned through coaching, leadership and real-world experience. Together, we'll forge unshakable confidence, master social dynamics and create a life rooted in purpose, brotherhood and bold action. Inside you'll get the tools and insights to become the strongest, most connected version of yourself. Let's dive in. Hey, what's up guys? Welcome to the Evolve Men podcast. I'm your host, Corey Baum.

Speaker 1: 0:46

So this podcast, as we get into this, is for men who are tired of pretending right, tired of feeling numb and asking whether this is it right. This is built for men who are ready to evolve, not just survive. This is for men who are ready for real talk. No performance, not perfection. As I say that, it kind of cracks me up because I've been through so many renditions of recording this podcast just to begin with right, like trying to get the audio right and the sound right and the video right and all of these different things. You know that it really is about just, uh, doing a cut and putting your word out there, being who it is, who you are, and letting the chips fall where they may, right, um, you know, I was at a point I will just kind of start it right from the beginning that, um, I created this really because I was at a place in my life where I, I was lost, right, I was doing all of the sort of the, all of the things that you're supposed to do or you're, you're told all your life you're supposed to do. I had, I had a really good education, you know, I had a long career, I was really smart, I've been doing everything. I, I had the, the wife and the house and all the toys and the kids, right, and the kids were going to go to college and um, but he, at the end of all of that, like I really was still just asking right, whether, like, why am, why is it that I'm doing all of this? Right, and why don't I like, why don't I feel good about where I'm at? Right, I'd done everything, I had checked all of the boxes, or at least so I thought, but I still had this like empty hole, uh, and I didn't know what it. I didn't know what the feeling was. I didn't know, like I didn't know why that was there, I didn't know how to fix it, I didn't know how to talk to um yeah, and so I really kind of just in doing my own work, like I, um, I needed a place where I could have real honest and raw conversations.

Speaker 1: 3:13

Right Like too often, uh, I just feel like those conversations aren't being had by people nearly at all anymore. Right, the the the people actually like connecting heart to heart and soul to soul and actually sharing what's on their mind. Right For, for a lot of my life, right, um, you know, and kind of going and I feel like this is the case with a lot of other guys like for a lot of my life, I had lived, uh, I'd lived, you know, the the nice guy mentality. Right Like I was giving to get, I was a people pleaser, um, I was, you know, seeking validation in in every place that I could possibly find, right, um, through, through any means sort of necessary. But at the end of that, right Like I was still so hollow I I didn't know what it was like to actually connect with somebody. Uh, to connect with my wife, to connect with my kids. Right, to have deep conversations to to live a life worth living, right and so, and and that's the same struggle that a lot of guys go through, and that's something that, uh, that's a lot of the reason that this podcast exists right, for just real stories. Uh, learning real tools and experiencing real growth growth right, as we go through this, you guys will learn a lot more about me, but I just want you to know that this is a lived experience. Right, this isn't just something that I write about in a book. Right, this is something that I've lived with and experienced for myself.

Speaker 1: 5:08

One of the things that I struggled with for the long time, for the longest time, right, was was this like outdated sense or like models of masculinity? Right, I'd been taught all of my life growing up that you know I need to. I need to be tall and strong and manly, whatever that means, and I don't need any help. And men don't show emotions, Right? Um, one of the one of the what was the saying that, uh, I'll give you something to cry about was a common, was a common phrase in my household. Right and so, and that's great and all, but the problem with that is that those models that we grew up on, right, and maybe our fathers and our grandparents, like all those things that were based on. Like, they're all collapsing Right, we're finding out that that's not successful in the ways that we want and the ways that matter most to us, and the bigger problem than that is that nobody told us what to do next, right? So what are we supposed to do now? We've got these models that we've lived our entire lives around and they're collapsing and we have no framework to move forward with.

Speaker 1: 6:28

Right, and unfortunately, a lot of men are struggling silently, right, they're isolated and ashamed and they're stuck in these patterns that aren't serving them or their family or their kids. Right, they're using porn, they're drinking alcohol, seeking validations, having affairs right, yeah, and the worst part of all of this, right, is that everybody is doing this alone, right, kind of along that same sort of line that we were taught that guys don't need help. Right, that you're, you're a sissy or you're weak if you seek out for help. Right, and we know, we know that those aren't working. Right, men don't evolve alone, they. We need tools, right, we need language and we need brotherhood, like too often anymore. Like, guys are completely disconnected from most other senses of of connection with other men, right, the things that we used to have in the past that brought guys together, you know, back in the day it was high school and college and things like that there was sports and there was football and there was people up and down the block, right, kids are playing and they're they're outside playing in the dirt and doing different things Like we. Just we don't have that anymore, and so we have this real lack of like guidance, uh, for how to lead, how to feel and and how to grow as modern men.

Speaker 1: 8:23

Right, and um, I for one, is myself like I don't know that I was really given a great example growing up of what it meant to actually be a man. Right, like I was, I was maybe given this like, uh, you know, kind of watch and hopefully pick up some of those sorts of things. But, but, honestly, like, a lot of those models are the things that I'm talking about are things that just that I've put into place and and they weren't necessarily having the outcomes that I've come to to want, right, and to to cherish right, so kind of along those lines. Right, I noticed, as I was doing all of this work, that, um, doing a lot of work on myself, right, and I was reaching out and connecting with other guys and that the I can't, you know, and guys in general, can't do this work alone. Right, we need tools and we need frameworks and language and, most of all, like I said, we need the brotherhood. Right To be able to run ideas against other men. Right To see how it's showing up for them in their lives and how they're responding to this event and how they were brought up. Right, and we need better reflections of how it is that we're to be living our lives. Right. And this podcast is meant for that container. Right, it's a container where we can share those sort of stories, we can learn those tools and the language and we can have that brotherhood that is going to connect us all.

Speaker 1: 10:18

So this isn't meant to be therapy, right. This isn't meant to be church or just like macho bootcamp. This is meant for men who are ready to lead, men who are ready to lead with depth and presence and integrity, for men who really want to be proud of the way that they live, that they love the ones that are around them and how they lead not only themselves but their families and in the community. Right, it's really like. How, for men that are that are proud to really like step into a more modern sense of masculinity? Right, like not completely getting away? Uh and this isn't even to say that like that, there, there wasn't good things out of the past that can't still be, you know, admired or used or cherished or sort of thing. But we've got to take the information from before and put it with the information that we have right now and make the best of all of that, right? So, most of all, this is men who are ready to evolve, right, that they've seen what it was and they know what they want it to be, and they just need the help in order to get there.

Speaker 1: 11:47

So this podcast is for high achievers that are feeling burned out or just unfulfilled right. For fathers that know that they really want something more for themselves and their families and their kids, but they don't have any idea of how to actually achieve that or how to get there. Right, this is for men who, for all intents and purposes, look fine, right, like everything is hunky-dory on the outside, but inside feel empty and hollow and shallow and don't have a sense of purpose and meaning and direction in their life. Right, this is also for leaders that are starting to realize that maybe you've got all of this power right and you can stand up there, but you have no, no purpose and you're finding that it leaves you feeling really hollow. So you know, I talked a little bit about my story, um, but to dig into it a little bit more, right Like I, I played the role really well.

Speaker 1: 12:54

Right, I wore the masks, I was the husband and the father and the businessman and such, and I mean I lived it day in and day out. On the outside, right, like everybody, you know the classic like social media sort of story where on the outside everybody thinks, like man, you know the, that couple is the happiest they could ever be, corey's got it all together, or the family does like they're really going somewhere. Um, and but inside, like I was, I was falling apart, like I was coming apart of the seams, like I had I had really, you know, at the bottom of it, like I had I can't even say really at a certain point that I had betrayed my values, because I don't know to an extent that I had really ever had them. Right, I don't know that I I was never really given an opportunity to be like to, to see, like, hey, this is what integrity is right, this is courage, this is these other things and these are these are why it's important to live that out in life, right, that's why this is why it's important to instill this and to to walk with this every day. This and to to walk with this every day, um, and kind of as a.

Speaker 1: 14:23

As a result of that right, I betrayed what values I did have, right, and myself and my family, um, yeah, and I I numbed out in any way possible Right, and some of the most common was porn. Um, I avoided conflict Like it was the plague, right, like I would do anything to avoid um having a hard, having to have a hard conversation. Um, I was basically your you know storybook nice guy and so for me, right, really, at the end of all of that right, I lived my entire life with like that um, not really knowing any different, and and I reached this point, finally, where I just I'd been faking it to an extent my entire life, right, and this wasn't something like I necessarily always knew what the um, what it was that was going on for me in my own head, right, but I mean there was time, a lot of times that I did, but I didn't know. I just thought that this was what men did, right? They, yeah, like men, watch porn, men had affairs, like our men. You know, can't be, um, can't be faithful that you know that this is what guys do. It's no big deal, right, um? And so I didn't know what. I didn't know, right, and but I knew, finally at a certain point, that what I was doing was not going to be sustainable and that, you know, it was going to take out everybody around me, and including myself and my family, you know, and, really, like, I came face to face with the truth of, more than likely, like who it was, that I was or I wasn't. So, enough about that. We'll talk about that in some of the future episodes.

Speaker 1: 16:31

But what this podcast is going to cover, right, this podcast is going to cover how to feel, how to feel more, not less, right, like, how to use your emotions as a tool instead of a weakness, right? So how do we, how do we express how we're feeling? How do we connect with other people? How do we share those sort of moments and emotions with our kids, with our families, with our friends? Right, it's going to talk about fatherhood, especially as it pertains to like, being intentional, right, showing up with presence and strength and leadership at home. We're going to talk about redefining masculinity and shedding these outdated rules that we have and stepping into a more grounded and powerful manhood. We're going to talk about what that looks like, what that doesn't look like, the ways that it shows up in our lives and how we can do that more authentically. Authentic leadership, right. How to lead your life, your family, your work, your brothers, right, and those around you with integrity, right. So how do we show up in every aspect of our life with more leadership and authenticity and integrity? We're going to talk about building relationships that matter, right. Building deeper bonds with your partner, with your kids, with your brothers right, and, most of all, really yourself, right.

Speaker 1: 18:19

I think too often anymore that I know for a lot of my life that all of my connections were at the surface. It was the usual like hey, man, how you doing, I'm good, right on. But when I finally started to ask the deeper questions, right it was, it was eyeopening. Like nobody knew what to do, right, it was like. It was like I was from a foreign planet, right, and I was almost like shunned away, um, from doing it.

Speaker 1: 18:51

So, on top of that, also doing the inner work, right, inner work around purpose and shame, our identity, developing discipline and confidence, and learning what it takes to, what it takes to really grow right, being intentional about this. And we're also going to hear about stories from the edge. Right, we're going to hear raw, real conversations with men who have, who have done the same thing, who have burned out, who have broken down right or have blown up their lives and what it was that they built from the ashes, right. So some of these episodes are going to be, are going to have real tools and reflections right, there'll be me sharing frameworks, proven things that I've learned throughout my journey, right, with my own experiences, with the skills that I've learned through coaching and therapy and such. There'll also be guest conversations with men who have evolved right, going through their lives and their examples and and the ways that that has showed up and maybe ways that they can help support others.

Speaker 1: 20:07

And then it's also going to be, you know, maybe at times, live coaching calls, right, listener Q and A's, uh, or some raw, just group style dialogues the thing that makes this podcast different, right, as I'm kind of standing here today, right, and I'll I'll be honest, like this is. This is super uncomfortable for me, but I know that if, if I want to show up and be, uh, my that, you know I can't always I don't always get a hundred takes in order to do it. Right, and so, and that'll be one of the things that set this podcast apart from the rest is that there's there's no fluff or theory in here, right, it's just grounded, usable tools. Right, these are things that you can take home tonight, that I've used with coaching clients, and things that I've learned that you can put into practice right away in order to make changes in your life. Right, as I was kind of saying with the other one is that this isn't about life. Right, as I was kind of saying with the other one is that this isn't about perfection. Right, this is about just honest evolution, right, like taking that first step into a new you. Right, taking that first step into that uncomfortable area of testing, you know, testing who it is that you can become.

Speaker 1: 21:39

And this isn't just a podcast, right, the other half of this. So there's the Evolved Men podcast and then there's the Evolved Men project, right, and this isn't just about, this isn't just about me, and this isn't about my story, and this isn't necessarily about coaching, right, this is about coming together as a community of men, as a movement, if you will, or a brotherhood, and rising up together, right, because, honestly, when any one man rises up, he brings up the rest of everyone else around him. So, what is a? What is an evolved man? Right? An evolved man is, is grounded, he's emotionally aware, he's clear in his leadership, he holds space for, for pain, um, and sets boundaries with grace, right, these aren't like.

Speaker 1: 22:35

This isn't the guy that just walks around super macho and he's an asshole to everybody, right? No, he's. He's strong, he's confident, but he's also soft, right, um, and he can hold that place for himself and his family and for others. Uh, and he lives from the inside out, right, Not from external validation. He lives from a place of knowing who it is that he wants to be and then continually and consistently taking the actions and doing the things that he needs to do in order to to have the things that he wants in his life, right, the things that are important to him, you know, and the reason that this all matters, right, is that, honestly, most men never get here, right? Men, they're born and they die with their music still in their hearts, right? They never, they never.

Speaker 1: 23:40

You know, it's almost this analogy of like they go to work every day, day in and day out, and they never actually let out or experience who it is, that they are right, and even it's not even that they don't even share it with anybody, like they don't even know it for themselves, that they've never explored, they've never asked the questions, right, because from a young age they were taught not to that. You know that emotions were bad and don't cry, don't feel this, Right? And so this really matters, and this is more about liberation matters. And this is more about liberation, right, liberation from the old stories that, like I talked about, about, um, you know, men don't have emotions, don't cry, all of these other things and this silent suffering that everybody's doing alone, right? And so the thing is is that you don't. You don't have to man up right in this in the old sort of way. You don't have to like do it harder, do it stronger, do it, you know, faster than everybody else.

Speaker 1: 24:49

It's to say that, hey, there's a, there's a new way forward, right, that we can do this. We can share our emotions, we can come together, we can support each other. We can, we can. We can come together, we can support each other, we can, we can do all of that and still be strong, confident leaders, right? Um, so my promise to you guys is I'm doing this right, is it's? I'm not this like guru that's up here posturing up Right, I don't necessarily have it all figured out, like I've.

Speaker 1: 25:21

I've had a pretty amazing journey, from the depths of where I was at to where I'm at today. Like, um, I've learned an immense amount, and those are the sort of things that I want to share with you. Right, I want to hear your examples and share where I you know, where I've been, where I've come from, where I've learned, and so it's just realness, real authenticity, right, every episode will be honest. It'll be challenging possibly, at times, but it'll still be supportive, right? So my commitment to you guys is just to be here and to walk the path with you, right, not to stand up on front of some podium and tell you that you know, this is what you need to do, and it's to tell you and to show you kind of along the way that, man, I've been there, like I have walked the walk, like I've walked through the shitty situations and I'm here to talk about it today. Right, so that's what I've got, um, for this first episode of the Evolvemen podcast. I'd really appreciate it if you guys would subscribe and follow and, most of all, um, just you know what.

Speaker 1: 26:38

Take. Take the next step, right, like, this doesn't have to be perfect, so if there's anything that you take away from this episode today, um, is to to just start doing the work. Just take 1%. Just take one step forward. Be 1% better every day, all right, so all right, guys, have a good one. That's what I got for this first episode. Bye, thanks for tuning in to this episode of the Evolve Men podcast. If today's episode challenged you, inspired you or gave you something to think about, don't stop here. Keep building, keep evolving. Head over to wwwevolvemenprojectcom, where you'll find free resources on confidence, leadership, relationships, communication and personal power Everything you need to start applying what you've learned here and take your growth to the next level. The tools are there. The next move is yours. Until the next time, men, stay strong, lead powerfully and live boldly.